“Please keep screen time the same” leaves a lot for another adult to guess. Which game is okay? When does it stop? What if dinner runs late or your child needs help saving?
Before another caregiver takes over, agree on the routine for that visit. Write a short note covering the activity, stopping point, help your child may need and what can change. Then talk through it together.
The aim is a plan the caregiver can use. It should fit the time, place and adult support available. This article is for handing over one visit. It is not a way to change a shared-custody agreement or override another caregiver's agreed responsibilities.
Agree on what is practical for this visit
Ask the caregiver what else they will be handling. A grandparent watching two children may not be able to set up the same activity you use at home. A sitter preparing a meal may need drawing supplies ready before you leave.
If care happens in another household, discuss that home's routine. Do not assume every home must use identical rules. Write what you have agreed for this visit, including any differences your child needs to know about.
A useful opening is: “Here's what we've been trying. Which parts will work while you're here, and what should we adjust?”
Name the activity and how it will end
Write the screen activity you have agreed is okay for fun: one chosen episode, a particular game, or another agreed option. Include where the device is kept and what your child needs help opening. Share access through an appropriate private method; don't put passwords in a routine note that may be photographed or forwarded.
Choose a stopping point the caregiver can recognize. “When this episode ends” is clearer than “not too much TV.” If the plan uses a clock time, write that time and explain how the child will save or exit the game.
Check game-saving needs beforehand. If a game has rounds that cannot fit the available time, agree on a different activity. Do not leave that decision to an adult who has never seen the game.
Explain necessary device uses separately
Make clear which uses are outside the recreational plan, such as assigned schoolwork, a planned family call or needed communication and support tools.
Keep disability and medical support uses available according to the child's needs and care guidance. Share any care instructions privately with the caregiver. This short screen-routine note does not replace a care plan.
The note only needs the information required for the routine. Leave out unnecessary details about your child's health, school or accounts.
Prepare what happens after the screen goes off
Name an activity that is ready, suitable for your child and possible with the supervision available. Say where the materials are and who will help.
Then explain what may help if your child is disappointed. That could mean a short reminder, help putting the device away or time near the caregiver before starting something else. Describe your child's actual needs rather than promising that a phrase will prevent upset.
Agree on what the caregiver can change. If the planned activity does not work, can they offer a familiar alternative? When should they contact you? Make the backup realistic, including what to do if you cannot reply promptly.
Copy this screen-routine note
Original planning template; not an excerpt from a paid guide.
- Visit or time covered:
- Recreational screen activity we agreed on:
- Where to find the device; opening help needed:
- When the activity ends:
- Reminder, saving or exit help needed:
- Where the device goes afterward:
- Necessary device uses kept available:
- Next activity, materials and where to find them:
- Adult help or supervision needed:
- What may help if my child is upset:
- Changes the caregiver can make:
- When and how to contact me; agreed backup:
Add contact details privately to your own copy. Keep the note where the caregiver can find it, rather than expecting them to remember a conversation from several days ago.
A completed example for one evening
This is an invented example to show the level of detail. Adapt it to your family.
- Visit: One evening at the child's home, before dinner.
- Activity: One episode chosen with the caregiver before the TV starts. Autoplay is off.
- Device and access: Living-room TV. The parent shows the caregiver the remote and the agreed show before leaving; no passwords are written here.
- Ending: When that episode's credits begin.
- Help: The caregiver gives a short reminder near the end and helps use the remote if needed. No game-saving steps apply to this visit.
- Device afterward: Remote on the living-room shelf; TV off.
- Necessary uses: A planned family video call is separate from the episode. Any needed support-device access stays available.
- Next activity: Draw a pretend dinner menu at the table. Paper and suitable drawing supplies are already there.
- Adult support: The caregiver stays nearby and provides the supervision this child needs. No kitchen tools are part of the activity.
- If upset: Use a brief reminder of the plan. Offer company before asking the child to choose what to draw.
- Flexibility: A familiar picture book is available if drawing doesn't appeal. The caregiver may move the activity to another suitable spot.
- Contact and backup: The adults confirm a private contact method and an agreed backup before the parent leaves.
Plan for one likely change
Suppose dinner takes longer than expected. “Use your judgment” may still leave the caregiver guessing. Agree on a specific option before you leave: “If dinner is late, offer the picture book after the episode. If that needs more help than you can give, use the backup we discussed.”
The backup could include a different screen plan if the adults agree it is appropriate. Write the actual choice in your private note. A backup that depends on an unavailable adult is not a usable backup.
Check the note before you leave
Ask the caregiver to talk through the plan in their own words. This is a chance to find missing details, not a test. Explain the agreed routine to your child too, using words or other communication that fit their needs.
After the visit, ask what the caregiver had to guess. Update that detail for next time.
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